Monday, December 26, 2011

2012--New Year or Apocalypse?

Christmas has barely ended and I'm ready to hit the ground running toward the new year. I can hardly wait for 2012 to start. I won't bore you with yet another New Year's resolution post. I'd rather talk about the 2012 apocalypse. First let me say I think the end of the world theory is BS. Yes, I know, the Mayan calendar ends, a ginormous explosion obliterating Earth? Or maybe we'll experience a Rapture-like occurrence? Or not. (On a quick side note, if that did happen, can I hand-pick a few who should poof out of existence?)

All joking aside, I do think there are a few things we do need to prepare ourselves for (no Mayan calendar required):

1) Reality show takeovers. Laugh if you must, but this is a serious--and potentially deadly--issue. Zombies don't have anything on reality show stars. Their brain-eating abilities are wasted on the folks who will humiliate themselves to prove they desperately want to win money or have their 15 minutes of fame. Prepare yourself by watching anything but these shows. I'm begging you. Take up knitting. Or baking. Or anything that averts your eyes and saves your mind from deteriorating into sludge.

2) Elections. If you cringed just reading the word, you're in good company. If you like to debate politics, you are at the wrong blog. I don't live in a bunker, but during campaign time, I want to. Frankly, I don't want to hear any politician tell me what they will do. I'd rather they not talk and just do it. *snicker* Okay, I know that's as likely as reality stars disappearing overnight. Prepare yourself by ignoring the incessant, useless campaign commercials (unless you want to make it part of a drinking game). But please do remember to vote.

3) Resolution Rebound. Have you heard of this one? It's the moment you realize your New Year's resolutions have fizzled out, and you console yourself by shopping, eating, napping, eating, weeping, eating, or some other activity that ultimately makes you feel worse. Prepare yourself by setting small, manageable goals. Better yet, don't set a specific goal, but instead plan to have a fabulous year no matter what comes your way. That's right, I'm talking fun, fun, and more fun.

4) Same old, same old. This one scares me the most. Whatever you do, no matter the situation, please don't resign yourself to another year of the same old existence. This includes staying in a job you hate, putting effort into a relationship that hurts you, or moving through your waking hours on auto-pilot (you know, that mindless daze that enables us to do the bare minimum with absolutely no joy). Prepare yourself by stepping out of your comfort zone. Do something out of the ordinary--drink chai tea instead of the double latte, drive a new route home, apply for your dream job, take a cooking class--anything that catches your fancy. The idea is to add depth and breadth to your life with no regard for the end of the world doom and gloom.

Make it one helluva a year, baby! Cheers for a fabulous 2012!


Christine Rains said...

Cheers! Have a grand 2012!

Jess said...

Thanks Christine! You too!

Christa said...

My husband just cancelled cable. This feels sort of huge.

Jess said...

That is huge. But your TV time just turned into reading time. :D