If you've ever taken a yoga or meditation class, you might have heard the phrase, "just for today." It's one of my favorite phrases. Why? It's a reminder to be present and think about the here and now. Use it as an opportunity to take a breath and focus. Here's my Just For Today List:
Just for today, smile more. See who returns your smile and be thankful for that gift.
Just for today, have fun. My favorite way to incorporate a little fun is to turn on music and dance with my kids. Try a new fitness class or funny movie. Anything that releases those feel good endorphins counts.
Just for today, add a little color to your life. Wear bright clothes. Buy crayons and color away (bonus points for staying in the lines). Paint a room. Buy flowers. Notice the positive shift in your mood.
Just for today, enjoy your family. Ignore the irritating habits that normally drive you crazy. Give them a hug and appreciate who they are.
Just for today, do something that feeds your soul. For me, that's writing. What's your passion?
Just for today, indulge. Watch that awful movie you secretly love. Treat yourself to a mocha. Add fifteen minutes to your walk/run. Savor it.
Just for today, try something new. A new route home. A new book. A new dish for dinner. Let it shake up your routine. Enjoy the experience for what it is.
Just for today, help a friend. Take him/her a meal. Offer an ear to listen, a shoulder to cry on, or a hand to help them up.
Just for today, go to bed a little early. Your body and brain will love the extra snooze time.
Just for today, give yourself a compliment. Beautiful new dress? Great hair? A job well done? Take note and let your self-confidence blossom.
Just for today, pass on a kindness. Open a door. Buy someone's coffee. A little kindness has a ripple effect. Be the one who starts the cycle.
Just for today, be honest. With yourself. With your loved ones. With your co-workers. Do this with grace and authenticity.
Just for today, be thankful. For whatever or whomever made your day.
Jess
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Monday, March 28, 2011
My Inner Critic
I believe Mondays are the worst day of the week. Bar none. I don't know why, but I typically receive the worst news on Mondays. I don't mind jumping back into the daily work and school routines, but I loathe the problems that seem to crop up on this dreaded day. The worst, by far, is self-doubt. For writers, it's also known as the Inner Critic. My Inner Critic is a bitch. She represents my worst fears and my darkest doubts. And she loves Mondays.
I hate to fail. I really do. I work hard to avoid failure (at least as an end result). But every Monday for a few weeks, I've received a rejection from an agent or two. I don't know why they all come on Mondays--perhaps that's the day these agents clean out their inbox, who knows? Regardless, my Inner Critic immediately begins to chip away at my resolve.
"Quit," she whispers. "Let it go. This dream will never happen. You're not a writer. You can't do it."
Sometimes I believe her, and I consider walking away. Don't get me wrong. I believe in my writing, I really do. I know there's room for improvement, which I constantly strive toward. But I'm a solid writer with publishing experience. I also know that in this business, you need at least one other person who believes in your writing--an agent or editor. Without someone like that in your corner, your chance at success dwindles. My Inner Critic knows this too.
"You're not good enough. You blew it. You have no idea what you're doing. Get a real job," Inner Critic sneers.
Self-doubt is the most insidious, damaging energy we encounter in our day. That internal voice slowly, steadily breaks down our confidence with harsh words and carefully planted seeds of uncertainty. We stumble on our path. We question our capabilities and fortitude. We lose sight of where our dreams can take us. We might even give up.
But your Inner Critic isn't done. Giving up doesn't mean she's won. It means you've opened the door and let her in. Inner Critic will attack your parenting, your weight, your self-worth, your finances, your hobbies--nothing is off limits. I don't know about you, but I have no desire to open that can of worms. So how do you combat your Inner Critic? Good question. Today I haven't been all that successful. Normally I'd recommend smiling. Do what you love. Ignore that voice. Push forward. Take a break. Laugh. Whatever method allows you to push that voice to the back of your mind where it's harder (or impossible) to hear.
I wish I could tell you there's a simple, magic formula for eliminating this voice. Maybe there is. I believe it varies depending our personalities and dreams. Our Inner Critics go after our fears. I don't think there's a right or wrong way to deal with that. I do think the worst thing you can do is give in and give up. Perhaps we need to alter our expectations or open our minds to different possibilities. Just don't let self-doubt win. Don't let that Inner Critic have free rein with your fears.
Tonight I'm going to shut mine up with a hot bath, a cup of tea and a journal. I want to write down my priorities so I have something to refer to every time I feel self-doubt creeping in. I hope you find the perfect method for keeping your Inner Critic under control.
Jess
I hate to fail. I really do. I work hard to avoid failure (at least as an end result). But every Monday for a few weeks, I've received a rejection from an agent or two. I don't know why they all come on Mondays--perhaps that's the day these agents clean out their inbox, who knows? Regardless, my Inner Critic immediately begins to chip away at my resolve.
"Quit," she whispers. "Let it go. This dream will never happen. You're not a writer. You can't do it."
Sometimes I believe her, and I consider walking away. Don't get me wrong. I believe in my writing, I really do. I know there's room for improvement, which I constantly strive toward. But I'm a solid writer with publishing experience. I also know that in this business, you need at least one other person who believes in your writing--an agent or editor. Without someone like that in your corner, your chance at success dwindles. My Inner Critic knows this too.
"You're not good enough. You blew it. You have no idea what you're doing. Get a real job," Inner Critic sneers.
Self-doubt is the most insidious, damaging energy we encounter in our day. That internal voice slowly, steadily breaks down our confidence with harsh words and carefully planted seeds of uncertainty. We stumble on our path. We question our capabilities and fortitude. We lose sight of where our dreams can take us. We might even give up.
But your Inner Critic isn't done. Giving up doesn't mean she's won. It means you've opened the door and let her in. Inner Critic will attack your parenting, your weight, your self-worth, your finances, your hobbies--nothing is off limits. I don't know about you, but I have no desire to open that can of worms. So how do you combat your Inner Critic? Good question. Today I haven't been all that successful. Normally I'd recommend smiling. Do what you love. Ignore that voice. Push forward. Take a break. Laugh. Whatever method allows you to push that voice to the back of your mind where it's harder (or impossible) to hear.
I wish I could tell you there's a simple, magic formula for eliminating this voice. Maybe there is. I believe it varies depending our personalities and dreams. Our Inner Critics go after our fears. I don't think there's a right or wrong way to deal with that. I do think the worst thing you can do is give in and give up. Perhaps we need to alter our expectations or open our minds to different possibilities. Just don't let self-doubt win. Don't let that Inner Critic have free rein with your fears.
Tonight I'm going to shut mine up with a hot bath, a cup of tea and a journal. I want to write down my priorities so I have something to refer to every time I feel self-doubt creeping in. I hope you find the perfect method for keeping your Inner Critic under control.
Jess
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